The Benchman couldn’t believe what he was hearing at the Falkirk game on Saturday... nor who made the Bairns award-winning pies
BEST LAUGH OF THE MATCH: Without doubt the sight of Cowdenbeath defending a corner with Colin Cameron and Lewis Coult standing by the posts to repel the aerial invasion. They made an ideal replacement for Little and Large, with the Cowdenbeath player/manager standing at 5ft. 8 ins and the big striker coming in at 6ft. 4 ins. Now which post should we be aiming for?
PIE SQUARED?: Falkirk win an award for the best pies in the First Division and they are made by- wait for it- Pars Foods Limited! Now I know we are grateful for any award, but come on lads - that’s a bit hard to swallow- no pun intended. Mince and Dunfermline anyone?
YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS: The legendary words of John McEnroe came to mind when UEFA announced the verdict of their enquiry into the Serbia racism allegations. You could not make it up. Fined £80,000 and made to play an Under 21 game behind closed doors? Niklas Bendtner gets fined more for breaching the underwear advertising regulations at Euro 2012. Come on guys - waken up please. You shudder to think what the punishment would be if you had a racist slogan stitched on to your Y-fronts.
THE BLUE BRAZIL: The strips were familiar in colour, but any similarities ended there. Cowdenbeath looked impressive in the opening stages and they were at least prepared to play attractive football and managed to pin Falkirk back. Good Luck to them and I hope they survive in the First Division. They have ambitious plans to build a new stadium and are in community ownership.
THE BIG FREEZE: Younger Falkirk fans haven’t really experienced real Scottish winters if they think that the recent weather has been cold. The Big Freeze which hit the UK in the winter of 1962/63 saw enormous disruption of the national sporting calendar. Football fans were desperate to see a match. For week after week pitches were frozen solid.
THIS WEEK’S MYSTERY PIC: A very rare picture indeed. What is the event and the location?
LAST WEEK’S MYSTERY PIC: Did you recognise the legendary Gordon Smith pictured in a Dundee strip? Gordon was a league winner with Hibs, Hearts and Dundee and this feat will probably never ever be repeated. He finds his way into nearly every All-Time Great Scotland teams selected by former players. A real class act.
LAST WEEK’ S TEASER: The Count was none other than John McCormack a defender at Brockville in the 1950s. He was a namesake of a famous opera singer of the time.
THIS WEEK’S TEASER: Which former Bairn won a Championship winners medal with Arsenal in his first season at Highbury?
BENCHMARKS: Match rating: 8 Team rating: 8 Opposition: 7 Referee: Robertson 6 Best Bairn: Stephen Kingsley