The Benchman: Bin that club song, Dundee

Can you name this goalscorer? Tweet your answer @FalkirkHeraldSp
Can you name this goalscorer? Tweet your answer @FalkirkHeraldSp

The Benchman never ceases to be amazed at how the Old Firm continue to domninate the pages of Scotland’s national press.

WORLD CRISIS - NOT: What on earth will folk think of us? The people in The Philippines are starving. There are terrorist threats all over the world. What makes the headlines in our papers? The remarks at the Celtic AGM when Celtic’s Peter Lawell said “Rory Bremner can pretend to be Tony Blair.” Accusations. Outrage. Complaints. Watch out for questions in Holyrood and Westminster. Will there be a debate at the United Nations?

CHANGED DAYS, INDEED: We are progressing but we really have dropped down the pecking order when we celebrate such successes as a draw with USA. Lawrie Reilly scored a first half hat-trick against them in 1952.

NEAR NEIGHBOURS: Walking back to the car on Saturday we started discussing the distance from Dens Park to Tannadice. It seems the Dundee clubs are 0.22 miles apart, while the Nottingham clubs are 0.74 miles apart. Next comes 0.79miles separating the Liverpool clubs.

CLUB SONGS: Some of these club songs are awful. The Dundee one extolling the virtues of their 1960s league winning team, which rattles off all their names, takes some beating. Imagine a song that goes like this: “There’s Slater and Parker and Doctor Ian Rae With Wright Irvine and Prentice they’ll win every day. Murray and Grierson and Merchant will score. And Moran and O’Hara will add a few more.” Get the idea?

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH: Maybe last Saturday was a real turning point. Football fans have been badly treated and taken for granted. £20 to watch a Championship match? You have to be joking. Add in travel costs and refreshments and you can kiss goodbye to the best part of £50. Falkirk fans gave an answer. Buses were cancelled. Attract youngsters? A family sport? And to think we discounted prices for Dundee fans when they came to Westfield.

LUCK HAD EVERYTHING TO DO WITH IT: Luke Leahy’s last-gasp goal at Dens might have had an element of luck, but the player insisted hemeant it. Either way, few could deny the Bairns deserved their point. Even died-in-the-wool Dens Park regulars admitted that their own side were lucky to get a point.

LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS: Last week’s mystery player was Peter Ralston and the five members of the S.F.A. Hall of Fame with a Falkirk playing connection were Alex Ferguson, John White, Willie Ormond, Mo Johnston and Craig Brown.

TEASER: Which player has played in the Manchester, Glasgow and Merseyside derbies?

MYSTERY PIC: Can you identify the famous player, seen above scoring at Brockville?