These clowns need to wise up – they’re not funny

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My daughter jumps out on me all the time in the house, hiding behind doors and walls and succeeds every time in making me jump out of my skin.

My heart skips a beat. Sometimes there’s even a girly shriek. Indeed, one time the police came to the door saying they had reports of a woman screaming and wanted to come in to investigate.

Very embarrassing which does nothing for the alpha male image I’ve worked so hard to assemble.

The thing is when someone does this to you, your first impulse is to want to ring their neck, but you can’t do that to your 10-year-old girl.

But what if it was a stranger, someone you didn’t know, maybe dressed as a stupid, scary clown or something who jumps out in front of you as you’re walking down the street at night.

You’d want to punch them in the face, right?

But you couldn’t, you’d end up in court charged with assault. Can you imagine the YouTube video of someone beating the hell out of a clown?

I think people should be well within their rights to clock one of these clowns right on the red nose. I may be incriminating myself here but that’s what I’d do if one of these idiots crossed my path, although any video might show the clown beating me up. Imagine the embarrassment of that.

This is a bit of an issue though. Should eejits with nothing better to do be able to go around scaring the bejeesus out of people and not expect any sort of comeback.

My daughter is petrified of them, she actually thinks they kill people. And what if someone did give them a slap? Would there be any sympathy for them?

Wise up clowns – you’re not funny!