If, as the song goes, it’s cliched to be cynical at Christmas, then colour me slush grey rather than pristine snow white.
The festive season is nothing more than an excuse to cash in and the noise of Roy Wood’s till is the only true note you’ll hear between now and Hogmanay.
The world of cinema is no better – Star Wars got completed just in time for the school holidays. ‘Bad Santa’ aside, Christmas is a time for rubbish movies.
If you’re sat on your own with your individual mince pie then ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ isn’t really going to raise your spirits, unless you can somehow make it to the happy ending free of emotional scarring.
For most, Christmas is a time for unwanted presents, relatives and cheeriness on TV and radio. If you want Christmas reflected as it should be then the Grand Gestures ‘Happy Holidays’ album nails it, tales of arrests, misery and unexpected parenthood revelations.
If, however, you’re already wearing your Christmas jumper, you’d better be good for goodness sake, or that copy of The Best Christmas Album in the World... Ever! to replace your worn-out copy might just get swapped out for a copy of Davie and Bing doing ‘LIttle Drummer Boy.
And no-one deserves that... surely?