The only football season I’m interested in started last week and I’ve already developed an ulcer over my team’s lack of success.
After signing away my life and any possibility of future prosperity to Sky Sports, I was able to catch the NFL season opener with the reining Super Bowl champion New England Patriots hosting the Kansas City Chiefs.
The deep joy I felt seeing the mighty, and slightly stand-offish, Patriots getting their heids to play with – the Chiefs cuffed them 42-27 – was short lived as my team of choice from 1986 onwards the Chicago Bears just couldn’t get the job done against The Patriots’ Super Bowl 51 opponents the Atlanta Falcons.
The Bears had a chance to win the game in the dying seconds, but the long necked donkey of a quarterback the coach has seen fit to play failed to connect with any receivers in the endzone on four straight tries.
It wasn’t one of Sky’s featured games, but I saw it all because the thoughtful producers edited together a short, sharp highlight segment to sum up Mike Glennon’s incompetence, showing his four rubbish throws, one after the other in quick succession while the presenter laughed it up.
Why the Bears are playing this big wally instead of the impressive young rookie Mitch Trubisky – arguably the most exciting and promising QB to grace the turf of Soldier Field since 1980s legend Jim McMahon – is beyond me.
And if you have bothered to read this far and all this American Football nonsense is beyond you then I couldn’t give a Mike Glennon.
The NFL is the second best thing about the winter – the first being a brussels sprout and pigs in blankets Christmas dinner.