House envy blues lead to a browned-off feeling

editorial image
Share this article

I have got a serious case of decor envy.

I was invited round to my neighbour’s house last weekend for afternoon tea but I suspect it was more to show off her newly renovated house.

Now, I hadn’t seen this lady or the inside of her house for some time, but I had spotted workmen’s vans outside for what seemed like months, so I was keen to get a nosey.

And almost immediately, I regretted accepting the invitation.

Everything in her home was beautiful. The furnishings were expensive looking and matched the wallpaper and accessories perfectly while her new fancy spot lighting only highlighted how lovely her home was. Even the dishes she served the afternoon tea on were lovely and matched the interior.

It made coming home very depressing.

I’ve not touched the decor of my home since we moved in 12 years ago.

While it may have been nice in 2000, it’s now looking past its best and no longer shabby chic - just plain shabby.

So, inspired by my neighbour’s lovely home I took a trip to a few DIY shops.

After hours of looking at wallpapers, paints, tiles and furnishings and debating over what would match, I took my selections to the till and parted with the best part of a week’s wages.

I decided to do the living room first - no point decorating my bedroom, I don’t think the dog minds much what that looks like.

Having chosen THE colours of the season - which are duck egg and almond, or blue and cream to you and me - I got cracking on transforming the room from boring brown to a space worthy of being in ‘Homes and Gardens’.

However, like every project I take on, things didn’t quite turn out that way.

The first coat of paint wasn’t the colour I was expecting, I think the brown underneath was too strong.

But I persevered and put on a second and third coat - hoping the end result would be better.

It wasn’t.

So now I’m left with walls that are nothing like I imagined and that don’t really match the cushions, lampshade and curtains I foolishly bought and then took the labels from.

And to make matters worse, I’m certainly no DIY expert so the paint has somehow seeped over the masking tape, marking the skirting boards.

Then, to top it all off, my grandson Jack was round while I was touching up the wall and - despite being told to stay away from granny’s work - he has somehow stepped in the paint tray and I now have lots of tiny shoe prints throughout the living room carpet!

The place looks worse than when I started, my purse is considerably lighter and my patience has run out.

Next time I’ll follow my neighbour’s lead and get the professionals in!