Grandma tells it like it is

My grandma isn't backwards in coming forwards
My grandma isn't backwards in coming forwards

Christmas is the time for far too much food, cheesy films and spending time with family.

Last year, my family and I journeyed halfway around the world to spend December ­and, of course, Christmas Day ­with distant relations in New Zealand.

While this was an amazing experience, it did mean that we were unable to be with my grandparents for the holiday, so this year we will be with them for a lot of the festive period. My sister and I will almost certainly be baking with my grandma on Christmas Eve.

I want to attempt a gingerbread house and my grandpa will find a way of helping us too. On Christmas Day, our house will be filled with 14 family members ­one more than usual, as one of our Kiwi cousins is joining us for the festivities so my mum suggested that my sister and I design a seating plan for the dinner table.

My grandma is usually content to tell us what’s on her mind, and we love her for it. Our family has had several good laughs about some of the things she has come out with in the past. So it wasn’t the fact that she was happy to share her opinion that surprised us ­it was the opinion itself.

The response I received when I enquired about why she doesn’t like seating plans was straight to the point: “I like to choose who I sit next to on the day. It depends on who’s been annoying me.” A mixture of mock gasps and loud laughs filled the room, which she picked up on as she tried to backtrack. “Well, eh, no, I just don’t want people to fight over who gets to sit next to me.” Finally, while barely controlling her laughter, she turned to me and warned: “Don’t be too upset if I don’t sit next to you.” Was that her way of telling me that sometimes I annoy her? I suppose I’ll just have to find out on Christmas Day.