Are we keeping you up Moggy?

Upon seeing the recumbent incumbent Jacob Rees-Mogg stretching out his lanky frame across the historic old benches of the House of Commons I started subconsciously chanting “Moggy, Moggy, Moggy – out, out out” under my breath again and again.

The audacity of this man to display this kind of blatant indifference in front of his colleagues – and the viewing television audience.

Who cares if the speeches were long and boring – he should be used to all the mind numbing Brexit rhetoric by now.

If I can sit through a school play or an amateur dramatic production without losing consciousness then a standing – or slouching as the case may be – MP can certainly hold it together for a couple of hours of inane chat and back biting.

I know Moggy has a bit more room to stretch out now all his Conservative chums are defecting, but that’s no excuse for this kind of behaviour.

Imagine if you or I did the same at our workplaces.

Better yet, imagine if a goalkeeper decided to have a power nap during a match or an air traffic controller kicked backed and caught a few ‘Z’s while planes were circling overhead waiting for clearance to land.

These are extreme examples of course, but you know what I mean.

It’s the Mogg’s job to represent his constituents – those misguided people who have continued to vote for him at elections – in these debates. How must they have felt when they saw him lying like a stuffed – admittedly sharp suited and booted – Guy Fawkes in the corner?

No doubt many of them were probably lying semi-conscious on their couches at the time so they may have missed it.

Now Jacob’s not crackers, so he must know that through his lackadaisical body language he has come across as arrogant and rude without – for a welcome change – even opening his mouth.

Maybe we should give him the benefit of the doubt – he’s been under a lot of stress recently and may have been burning the candle at both ends counting the millions of pounds he is said to have made since the Brexit referendum.

Will the real Jacob Rees-Mogg please sit up.