A man caught driving when he was almost seven times the limit had been celebrating his father’s 100th birthday.
Falkirk Sheriff Court heard Australian Robin Phillips (56) was stopped by police in Larbert around 8pm last Friday.
The photocopier salesman was at the wheel of a Renault Captur.
Sheriff Craig Caldwell said he was surprised Phillips could “see a car never mind attempt to drive it”.
The court heard Phillips had travelled from his home in Sydney to celebrate his father’s 100th birthday.
Afterwards he visited a friend and decided to drive back to the place he was staying after a cab he had ordered did not show.
Defence solicitor Mark Fallon said: “He had ordered a taxi to take him home but it did not arrive.
“He made the rather foolish decision to attempt to drive the short distance home.
“It was only about three miles.”
Phillips pleaded guilty to driving with an alcohol reading of 153 microgrammes per 100 millilitres of breath – 6.95 times of the legal limit of 22.
The solicitor said his client was due to fly back to Australia that night “if he was given the opportunity to do so”.
Sheriff Caldwell banned Phillips from driving for three years and fined him £1250.
He ordered him to pay the fine before leaving the UK.
The sheriff said: “You were seven times the legal limit in this country, Mr Phillips.
“I’m frankly surprised you could see a car never mind attempt to drive it.
“This was a move of unparalleled stupidity in my view.
“Had it not been for your residence elsewhere, you would have indeed been facing a residence elsewhere today.
“If this fine isn’t paid by 5pm today, this court will inform the aviation authorities and you will not be able to leave this country until it is paid.”