10 things you should NEVER say to someone from Falkirk (and why)

Located in the heart of central Scotland, Falkirk is famed for attractions like The Kelpies and The Falkirk Wheel, but like any community it has its own quirks that it pays to be mindful of.

By Thomas Mackay

Published 14th Jul 2022, 10:55 BST

Updated 14th Jul 2022, 14:21 BST

This article contains affiliate links. We may earn a small commission on items purchased through this article, but that does not affect our editorial judgement.

From silly questions to pronunciation faux pas, there are many ways that you could rub someone from Falkirk the wrong way.

We asked our readers “What is something you should NEVER say to someone from Falkirk?” and they offered us their regional expertise on how best to avoid offending locals.

So, if you’re planning on visiting in future, here’s our list of 10 things you should NEVER say to someone from Falkirk.

This misunderstanding is a Scotland-wide occurrence, but can likely crop up in Falkirk. When someone asks “Dae ye ken?” they’re not referring to a gentleman or indeed Barbie’s associate. The word “ken” is Scots for “know”, so “Dae ye ken whit I mean?” is simply to ask “Do you know what I mean?”

1. “Who is Ken?”

This misunderstanding is a Scotland-wide occurrence, but can likely crop up in Falkirk. When someone asks “Dae ye ken?” they’re not referring to a gentleman or indeed Barbie’s associate. The word “ken” is Scots for “know”, so “Dae ye ken whit I mean?” is simply to ask “Do you know what I mean?” Photo: Elena Mishlanova (via Unsplash)

No, they’re a Falkirk BAIRN. Although both ‘wean’ and ‘bairn’ are Scots words referring to a child i.e., a son or a daughter, Falkirk is best-known for using the word ‘bairn.’ Falkirk Football Club is nicknamed ‘The Bairns’, and this is a reference to the natives of Falkirk and their town motto: “Better meddle wi’ the de’il than the Bairns o’Fa’kirk.”

2. “So you’re a Falkirk wean?”

No, they’re a Falkirk BAIRN. Although both ‘wean’ and ‘bairn’ are Scots words referring to a child i.e., a son or a daughter, Falkirk is best-known for using the word ‘bairn.’ Falkirk Football Club is nicknamed ‘The Bairns’, and this is a reference to the natives of Falkirk and their town motto: “Better meddle wi’ the de’il than the Bairns o’Fa’kirk.” Photo: Mordolff (Getty Images Signature)

Listen you, the Kelpies (i.e., the two giant equine statues representing shape-shifting water spirits) are located BETWEEN Falkirk and Grangemouth. To be specific, they are located in an area known as The Helix - this is an open parkland that is serviced by National Cycle Routes and the John Muir Trail.

3. “The Kelpies are in Grangemouth!”

Listen you, the Kelpies (i.e., the two giant equine statues representing shape-shifting water spirits) are located BETWEEN Falkirk and Grangemouth. To be specific, they are located in an area known as The Helix - this is an open parkland that is serviced by National Cycle Routes and the John Muir Trail. Photo: Andrew Milligan

This (along with "mon the Pars") is one of those statements best left alone unless you’re prepared for the ensuing commentary. Falkirk and Dunfermline are roughly 13 miles apart and have football clubs that are of similar sizes and compete at similar levels.

4. “I prefer Dunfermline.”

This (along with "mon the Pars") is one of those statements best left alone unless you’re prepared for the ensuing commentary. Falkirk and Dunfermline are roughly 13 miles apart and have football clubs that are of similar sizes and compete at similar levels. Photo: Orietta Gaspari (Getty Images Signature)

Falkirk Scotland