The Benchman: Rangers’ fanciful notions of a treble

Who is this team and why are they celebrating? Clue: it was one of the all-time great Scottish football upsets. Tweet your answer @FalkirkHeraldSp
Who is this team and why are they celebrating? Clue: it was one of the all-time great Scottish football upsets. Tweet your answer @FalkirkHeraldSp

The Benchman reflects on a bad week for the Bairns, and wonders where the real Falkirk supporters were at the recent Fans Forum.

GAME OF TWO HALVES: What a change that was in the second half at Dumbarton. Falkirk were all over The Sons and should have had rattled in at least three goals by half time. The second half was a sorry story and the supporters buses must have had a pretty silent journey home.

SAFETY FIRST: Everton and Manchester City were quite right to cancel their midweek matches in those hurricane-like conditions. When programme stalls are flying about and roofs are coming off you have to put safety first.

FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM: What are we to make of the audience at the Fans Forum held in Behind the Wall recently? Take away the club officials and those who organised the evening, and there were barely enough fans to have filled a phone box. Conclusions? Either everything is going so well that there is no need to meet, or the whole format has had its day.

TREBLE, WHAT TREBLE?: Lee McCulloch must surely have had his tongue planted firmly in his cheek when he said that Ally McCoist would deserve great credit if Rangers pulled off “The Treble” - that’s the Scottish Cup, Ramsdens Cup, and the third tier title. If Rangers win the Scottish Cup then McCoist might just then be worthy of credit.

A WEIGHT OFF THEIR SHOULDERS: Interesting comment from new Dundee manager Paul Hartley regarding weight training. He sees no value in upper-body strength if players can’t run.

TEASER: Can you name the player who once scored a hat-trick in a Charity Shield for the reigning champions and ended the season with the new champions, the team they had just beaten?

REALLY SAYING SOMETHING: Carlisle have decided not to take Derek Riordan on after a trial period. Instead they have turned to that promising youngster by the name of Nacho Novo.

LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS: Simon Stainrod was signed from Rouen. The mystery men in the were Lawrie Reilly, Alan Hodgkinson and Billy Wright who married Joy Beverley.

EMOTIONAL DAMAGE: The precedent has been set by the judge who awarded damages to fans of the late Michael Jackson for the “emotional damage” suffered by the passing of their idol. What about back-dated claims for the Wembley defeats of 7-2, 9-3 and 5-1 at the hands of England or the Falkirk disasters at Fir Park and Tynecastle when we tried to get out before we saw ten goals conceded?

TRUST HOLDING: Rangers Supporters Trust have bought up another 200,000 shares in the troubled club. That increases their holding to an impressive 0.86% of the total. Ocean and drop anyone?