Rent a flat, mate

Picture: Dave McKay and Billy Bremner
Picture: Dave McKay and Billy Bremner
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The Benchman debates Garry O’Connor’s next destination, referees’ spell-checkers and has some advice for Steve Bruce

OUTSIDE BET?: A friend of mine who earns his living playing poker gave me an outside tip. He is betting Denmark to win all their Group games. He also got 100/1 on them to win. What are the odds that Kasper Schmeichel scores the winner in a penalty shoot-out sudden- death decider against Tim Krul?

REFEREE NIGHTMARE: What was that guy on in the Poland v. Greece game? Papastathopoulos was shown two yellow cards for “offences” that only Senor Carbballo spotted. Hope he enjoys writing out his report - he also booked Holebas, Karagounis as well as sending Szczesny off. His spell-checker wouldn’t be much use to him.

GARY O’CONNOR’S AGENT: So he tells us that Gary has two “big name clubs” after his signature? Big name? East Scunthorope Wheelbearing and Clutch Repairers Social Club Wanderers might be one of them.

AND THE VOTE IS...:The vote needs to be 8-4 in Rangers favour. Now then, Sporting Integrity or Financial Self-Interest? Watch them as they arrive at Hampden. Spot those wearing brown trousers and cycle clips.

TEASER: Bill Shankly was manager at Liverpool from 1959 to 1974. During that period he signed nine Scots. Tommy Lawrence and Billy Liddell were already there. Can you name the nine?

MARK MILLAR:Good luck to Mark at Tannadice. What a transformation in his game after that first season when he seemed to be at odds with the world and had a terrible disciplinary record. He was a revelation last season and deserved all the praise he got.

ANYONE WHO HAD A HEART: So Hearts are looking out for a new manager for the Tynecastle Roundabout. It seems anyone with a maroon connection is being put forward by the media. Paul Hartley, Steven Pressley, Colin Cameron and others are being mentioned. Vlad The Impaler will no doubt surprise us all. The successful applicant will need a strong will, some body armour and a monthly season ticket to Haymarket.

ALL CHANGE: Falkirk are changing their colours to green and yellow and their badge to a lion rampant with a little steeple on the base. Imagine the reaction that would cause? Spare a thought for the supporters of Cardiff City who are being subjected to just such a change. All the usual marketing-speak is being rolled out about image, branding, identity and new commercial opportunities. What price tradition and history and community identity?

MYSTERY PIC: Name the two Scots in action and their then teams.

BENCHMARKS: This week’s Jubilee match was a possible title decider between Falkirk and Clyde at Brockville. Falkirk won 2-1 and lined up as follows. Newman, McDonald, McPhie, Gallacher, Wilson, McCabe, Delaney, Dunlop, Plumb, Devlin, Brown. Match rating: 9 Team rating:9 Opposition:8 Referee:7 Best Bairn: Jimmy McPhie