The gift of music

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Most serious music fans are pretty nihilstic, but at the same time always looking for ways to enhance their record collections.

So embracing Santa and all his commercial ways may lead to that Velvet Underground acetate being shoved down your chimney come the 25th.

Of course, with the advent (ho ho ho) of the mp3, musical gifts are less tangible nowadays – you can’t even sign your name when sending that not-all-that-special someone their Adele download.

Fortunately you can combine music and alcohol to get you through Yule. Several acts have their own personalised wine, including AC/DC and the Grateful Dead – surely acts who are more familiar with Jack Daniels or similar. Though Simply Red and Olivia Newton-John are definitely (red red) wine bands.

Happily, vinyl is still on the up, as are T shirts, with quite a few bands bundling the two together. Perhaps The Ramones’ label might try this, so that anyone wearing a tee would actually get to hear the music first.

But for something a bit more affordable, calendars are always a surefire gift. Last year, Cliff Richard wrestled with One Direction for the nation’s hearts. Actually, that didn’t come out like it was meant to...